It is what it is....it's whatever

My friend is dating the girl I like was crazy bwt ha … It hurts yep but what hurts isnt that my friend is with her. It hurts wen I see every post and every stat that was about him… She never did that for me… We kept our relationship under cover because she thought being public would complicate things… Well it made me feel like she was embarrassed to be with me yet she claimed to love me… I just feel pathetic I was ready to climb on the highest point and shout out my love for her and didn’t care what anyone had to say about it, what hurt most was she wouldn’t do the same… I tried to be understanding and stick it out but I guess I wasn’t something to be proud of. I called her the one night I poured my heart out to her told her how I felt I exposed my self. She told me she can’t reply she has to think about it. That’s the thing I didn’t have to think about it,I knew. People ask me why I don’t wana date … Well cz I bruse easily…. Wen I love I love with all my heart and when I cry, I cry with all my soul. I want to love someone to love me as much I do them bcoz that’s the only love I know. I won’t lie she broke my heart gave my all and it wasn’t good enuf to write I’m thinking bwt u on my wall… It takes 2weeks for her to write it on his… Wen ish gets sour who does she cum 2… And I must be understanding. Y am I always second best I’m good but not good enough… I ges I just want to be the one and not one of….

Stranger
Stranger your the closest and the only friend I have. Your the best friend I’v ever had because u don’t know me,I don’t you, you don’t care about me and I don’t care about you. Because of this u cant hurt me I can’t hurt you. U don’t have any expectations of me and don’t want anything special from me so I can’t disappoint you. Because you have no fear of hurting me you’ll tell me the truth no matter what bcz u wudnt want to protect me. My friends lies to me to “protect” me, my father looks at me with disappointment when I do something wrong because he cares. My girlfriend rejects me wen she can’t take anymore of my bad habits, my Coach wants me to run faster, my teacher wants me to work harder all these ppl love me. But u stranger don’t care how hard I work how fast I run, whether or not I’m untidy, or what I did last night. You stranger don’t care how I dress,how I look or how I talk -where I come from or where I’m going going. you stranger just enjoy my company laugh at my jokes, you stranger listen attentively patiently to my stories and share some of yours. You stranger accept me as I am. You could walk away anytime it wouldn’t matter to you or me but you chose to give me a piece of your life and share it with me. You stranger are my best friend and yet you don’t love me or do you? We had a good laugh you and I stranger but now u must go… You leave so easily with no desire to spend more time with me, but I’m Fine with that, I dont feel rejected, I feel privileged that I met you stranger. I am not sad because I know u will remember me stranger and you will tell your family and friends about me .. It will go something like this ” o you know I met this really kwl guy the other day”… U saw me at my best and you will share my memory with the world at my best as I will urs. You will live your life and I will live mine. I don’t know you but for that moment you were the best friend I ever had because you saw me for me and didnt judge you allowed me to be myself and it was good enough. Now I must go back to my loved ones and live up to their expectations and be better than what I am… No u don’t understand stranger because they love me they want the best for me and just me isn’t good enough